C. Marie is the author of the book "The Holy Spirit and Christian Testimonies".
Every aspect of “Tangi Fields” was thoroughly examined and studied by some adult
age females. Then whenever her name came up of if they happened to see her,
they formed gossip sessions in which they insulted and ridiculed everything that
they noticed about her.
Those females carried themselves as if they
were characteristically envious, insecure, self-important, boasters and
hateful. In connection to “Tangi,” they competed with and obsessively compared
themselves to her. They searched for reasons to brag and pat themselves on
their own backs. While they acted out in those ways, they tried to discover
everything that they wanted to dislike about her, and place below them. From
those isolated self-breakthroughs, they would convince themselves and others
that she was inferior to them overall, and that they were truly special
females.
As those females typically complimented themselves and openly
expressed their offensive opinions about “Tangi,” they always looked for more
reasons to lengthen the heights of the pedestals that they appeared to have
stood on, and act over-confident about themselves.
Other people who
were a part of those females’ inner circle were encouraged and influenced to
automatically find reasons to despise “Tangi.” Then once the others placed her
behind and below those females, the others went along with the oppositions as
they also included themselves to offensively band against her.
Eventually, if those females and their inner circle had anything direct
to say to “Tangi,” while in her presence, it usually was in a form of dirty
looks, unkind remarks, self-absorbed type comments, silent tension, and hostile
confrontations. As she came to view them as her enemies, she did not think that
she done anything to motivate them to strongly dislike her to the extent that
they all had, as she came to expect those reactions whenever she was in their
presence. So over the following years, due to the constant dramas and conflicts
that she encountered with them, she realized that they had no limitations as to
what came out of their mouths and how mouthy they were to her.
Regardless as to what those females and the others from their inner
circle said against “Tangi,” she knew that no matter how wrong they were, they
knew that the others would automatically backed them up and participated in
their fights. So whatever conflicts they created, they knew that the others
would help them finish the hostilities. Based upon the animosity, “Tangi”
interpreted them all to have been generally unhappy, angry, hateful, and
immature, as they were quick to make enemies out of everybody.
“Tangi”
felt that her enemies done a lot to push her buttons and test her limits. Those
were in the amount of offenses that they tried to and actually done to her. She
was regularly placed in situations in which she was led to control her part of
the conflicts with them, because it was out of their characters to flinge from
anybody. They were not known for walking away from brawls, competitions, and
arguments, as they kept entertained by their creations. She was almost always
the one who walked away from them.
At the same time, “Tangi” was
unknowingly in spiritual wars whenever she was around her enemies, which
adversely affected her enough to where she eventually accepted hatred in her
heart. In the Christian faith, as she became a hateful person, she had issues
with peace, tranquility, and happiness.
“Tangi” wore her hatred on her
sleeve and was constantly reminded of the hostility that she had with her
enemies. The situation escalated to where she physically felt hatred in her
throughout the days and nights. She refused to mention the first names of some
of her worse enemies, she had some reactions whenever she heard their names from
other people’s mouths, and seeing individuals who resembled them did not make
much of a difference to her either.
Whenever she felt hateful, she
suffered from tension, anger, bits of fire in her vision, and body shakes.
As “Tangi” clung to the dangerous, deep-rooted hatred, she regularly
entertained herself with unholy imaginations. The ungodly thoughts and
stressful body reactions led her believe that she would have lost control of
herself if some of her enemies were around her at the very moments when she
tolerated the bait of hate.
“Tangi’s” hatred often came in her dreams
over the years, and the situations were serious enough that she awakened with
big grins on her face afterwards. But instantly became sad, ashamed, and
embarrassed because by then, she immediately thought about God. She still
claimed Christianity, tried to walk in The Word of God faithfully, and tried to
develop spiritually in the Lord. Yet, as she recalled, whenever she was caught
off guard by acknowledging what she carried in her heart, she would acknowledge
that she had a problem, a spiritual one, and God knew it.
Eventually,
while “Tangi” labeled herself as a woman who grew up and tried to carry herself
lady-like, with class, she further aimed to hold her tongue and outgrow
bitterness.
But “Tangi” did not want to admit to herself that she hated
anybody because she knew that hatred went against The Word of God. So she used
phases such as “can’t stand” and “really don’t like” instead.
As
“Tangi” studied The Holy Bible and prayed to God throughout the years, while she
fed on the bait of hate, she inevitably began to resist the hatred that she
carried.
From a dream, “Tangi” unexpectedly envisioned a couple of her
enemies inside of her home. However, she was cautioned about those particular
ones. After she awakened, she was puzzled about the dream because although the
years that passed had helped minimize some of the influence of hate, she did not
believe that it was probable that those individuals would be inside of her home
as the dream suggested.
While “Tangi” stayed focused on her growth in the
Christian faith and other thoughts instead of her enemies, chains-of-events
happened within the same year of the dream. Then she received friendly
visitations in her home from the same particular ones who she had a dream
about. She was delighted to sincerely stretch out her arms to the others ones
afterwards.
Due to the magnitude of the intense hatred that “Tangi”
once held inside of her heart, as hate became of part of who she was as a
person, such bait directed her emotions, mouth, and actions for a long time. So
based upon her spiritual development in the Lord, she felt an unavoidable strong
push from within, to go on a necessary fast and prayer immediately. It was a
double one, where after it was over, she ate a meal before she acknowledged that
she urgently needed to go on another fast and prayer afterwards.
During the fast and prayer period, “Tangi” felt driven to minister to
others, and based upon how she felt, she believed that she was very
Spirit-filled. She came to believe that the Holy Spirit was similar to an eye
of a powerful hurricane, who had winds that reached out and affected everybody
around her, which created a spiritual whirlpool from within her.
“Tangi”
never forgot the dream that cautioned her about a couple of her enemies who were
the heartless ones out of the bunch, as they carried themselves as if the dream
was one that accurately forewarned her about them.
“Tangi” understood
that as God judges everybody and everything, she needed to make sure that she
always stood right with Him, even if people she knew did not.
From
that, “Tangi” wholeheartedly continued to love her enemies, and at a distance
whenever any of them attacked her by their words and had disagreeable
characteristics.
Regardless, “Tangi’s” enemies stayed in her thoughts
and prayers, while the bitterness from them softened overtime.
Meantime, “Tangi” she was able to look out for any of them, to bless
them physically, she jumped at the chances to do so.
As “Tangi” adapted a
character in which she became a prayerful woman, she came to habitually pray for
herself, her own family members, people she knew, her enemies, as well as those
who she did not know but heard about, even if she read about them from her local
newspaper.
It had gotten to where the very same people who “Tangi” once
hated from the core of her heart and the pit of her soul became the same ones
who she often asked God to consider wealth, longevity, and peace for them and
their households. She also made request to God if they would be led to
faithfully walk on the path to Eternal Life.
Alongside with that,
mockery, nosiness, and crude gossip became something that “Tangi” avoided.
Whatever ridicules, insults, and tattling from whatever goes on in other
people’s personal business that “Tangi” was told, she made it a part of her
character to pray to God on behalf of whomever the offensive gossips, spiteful
comments, and malicious tattling were about.
Whenever “Tangi” was given
information about the problems of other people besides her enemies, they also
went to her thoughts and prayers, as she physically blessed them if able to, out
of concern and mercy.
(© 2012 C. Marie – All rights reserved. Written material may not be duplicated without permission.)